On Being Quiet

24 “Teach me, and I will be silent;

    make me understand how I have gone astray.

25 How forceful are upright words!

    But what does reproof from you reprove?

26 Do you think that you can reprove words,

    when the speech of a despairing man is wind?

Job 6:24-26

I think sometimes it’s really easy to believe I’ve got something important to say just because the Lord has spoken to me. I even heard a friend say the other day that if God speaks to you you must speak it out. I don’t think that’s accurate, though.

I’ve been in a season of “speaking up” and I think that it’s very important to do so when the Lord asks you too, but being quiet is also sometimes necessary. Being quiet means you can listen. Being quiet means you can trust God for the right opportunity. Being quiet means learning to be humble.

Being quiet is a faith building exercise in discipline.

Quiet is hard for me.  I’m an extravert.  I’m gregarious, bombastic even.  I’m enthusiastic about everything and I’ve always got an opinion.  Always.  So learning how to be quiet has been a new skill for me, but a necessary one.

Choosing to be quiet still communicates something.  Being quiet means I have nothing to prove.  I have nothing to defend, and I have no need to be heard by anyone.  It means that when I do choose to speak, I have something to say.

When it comes to speaking up, the Lord has been teaching me how to be more confident in my value to His Kingdom.  I don’t need other people to validate me or even agree with my perspective.  I don’t need to convince anyone of anything.  I can speak or be silent as the Lord leads, and not by my own assumptions.

Where my voice has “gone astray” in the past is when I’ve felt insecure.  When I’ve been afraid that no one cared about what I had to say, I felt the need to prove myself to them.  I felt the need to show them that I had important things to say, things that others needed to hear.

I don’t feel that way so much anymore.  

At the beginning of my journey toward choosing to be silent I would often pray that God would have someone else say what my heart ached to say.  I would ask God to empower someone else to speak up since I felt like no one would want to hear from me, or take what I had to say seriously. So sad and hard, but also humbling.

I learned that God’s words will not be silenced.  Often the ideas that the Lord had planted in my own heart did in fact come to life from someone else’s boldness to speak, but being silent in those days hurt me deeply.  It reinforced my own false narrative that even God wanted someone else to say what He had given to me.  

I’ve since realized that I put those restrictions on myself needlessly, but God was faithful to me anyway.  Silence wasn’t always necessary, but I hadn’t yet learned that what I had to say had value.  

We are all so varied and unique.  Each one of us has our own way of speaking, our own way of articulating our thoughts.  And when the Lord gives me something to say, then I must assume that the Lord wants me to say them.  He gives words to me to speak or write because He wants them to be “Daisy flavored.”

I was once a woman of despair.  I felt like no one wanted to hear my heart.  I even felt like God wanted me to be quiet.  But I was wrong.  God is good, and He is more than willing to meet us where we are, even when we are wrong, or maybe especially when we are wrong.  By doing so, He can lovingly guide and direct us to what is right.

As the scripture above says, in silence He can teach me where I have gone astray.  Only then will I know how to hear what He has to say, and obediently speak it out.  To speak boldly without discernment offers nothing.

Now I can confidently be still and quiet, but I can also, just as boldly, declare what the Lord has called me to speak.  Both have value.  I’ve been learning that being quiet often amplifies my words when I do choose to speak. 

Consider taking more moments of silence in your life.  Then sit back and see what God does.